Here’s a story for yall…
Over the summer, I was kicking it with the homies DN & SS at Uptown Cafeteria, which was my fave hangout last summer. It has a very fabulous rooftop & everybody was kicking it up there. Anyway, the three of us were having some dinner & drinks, enjoying the weather & the view, when I looked up & saw some serious eye candy. The man was yummy delicious yall. When my crew & I were leaving, we were stopped by the eye candy & we all chopped it up, and the eye candy & I wound up exchanging numbers.
We talked back & forth via text for a while, and then I started running into him regularly when I went out to my fave spot on Friday nights. We’d flirt & chop it up but we didn’t go out. It took several months for me to get a chance to talk to him 1-on-1, and when I did….it was a big let-down. He’s not my kinda guy for numerous reasons (40yo, 4 kids, twice divorced, and not the brightest bulb in the box). So I put him in the “casual acquaintance” category & kept it moving…yet he was persistent. After months & months of pestering me, I finally agreed to meet him for drinks.
And just like I thought, our one & only date was a bust. We have ZERO chemistry, yet he had a lovely time *sigh*. So much so, that he continues to ask me out. OFTEN. And I keep saying no. And telling him why. Yet he does not believe me. For why?
Men, why do yall do this? A woman tells you straight up, point-blank, that she’s not fucking with you, and yet somehow yall see that as a green light? Really? Are you not hearing what we’re saying? Or are you conditioned to not stop at “no”? (bad move btw, no means no fellas, all the time). A woman who doesn’t want to date you, who doesn’t want to sleep with you, is not a challenge. She’s simply not interested. There are plenty of parched women who would love a little bit of your attention, why waste it on a woman who doesn’t want it?
My strategy is to keep up the good fight & hope that he finally realizes how serious I am about not having any type of dating situation with him. Let’s see what happens. Granted, I know I probably should have cut it off & been more forceful about it months ago. I have a problem with that tho, and I was hoping he’d give up & move on to a woman that is less than a challenge. Sadly, he’s kept up the good fight *sigh*.
Any suggestions on how to handle this? Can the men please explain why yall do this?