I wanted to write.
I wanted to finish my 30 day blogging challenge and write everyday.
And then my life got in the way. It happens.
I admire those people who making writing their living, who can write everyday, on demand. I do not envy them. I write when the mood and inspiration strikes me. I write about what I want, when I want. Hence why there’s been some long periods with no posts.
Sometimes I wish I could be one of those disciplined writers, who set up blocks of time & let the words flow effortlessly from their fingertips. It doesn’t work that way for me – generally I need some strong emotion, a conundrum or life-changing thoughts to get me in the space to write. I tend to write in the moment, when I’m worked up & have something I need to share, right at that moment.
When I really try, I can’t do it. At least I feel like I can’t do it.
The key for me is keeping it light.
This reminds me of when I was in school. I could never write multiple drafts of my papers or reports unless I was forced to by my teacher. If I didn’t have to, I would wait until the last possible moment to write my essays. I was notorious for writing 3rd period AP History papers in 1st period British Lit class (and trust me, it was a better use of 1st period, my Brit Lit teacher sucked). In college, I wrote my personal essay for my grad school applications in about 20 minutes, proof-read and attached to my applications immediately. That must have worked, considering I got into 3 out of 4 schools. I’m a natural procrastinator, but because I’ve gotten good results with work I did at the last minute, I’ve now tricked myself into believing that I do my best work under pressure. I must have a deadline looming right this second in order for my brain to turn on fully & the words to flow.
This happens at work too. At some point I’m going to tackle my procrastination.
But not today.
Today…I just write…something…anything. To help the words flow.